Photo Courtesy of Jessica Lorren Photography

Every single relationship will entail fighting. It is inevitable, so do not freak out when your relationship isn’t all roses and daisy fields. In fact, fighting is a necessary “evil” of every relationship that can lead to a much better and healthier relationship, and not fighting is a much larger cause for concern because it usually means things that need to be addressed are just being brushed under the rug. Watch out for a major issue down the road or a pretty shallow relationship. Fighting is the Drano of marriage; it flushes out the clogs that stop the flow of love and communication. It isn’t a question of if you will fight but rather how you fight that makes all the difference in your marriage or relationship.

Do not misunderstand what I am saying. I am not a proponent for knock-down-drag-out fights or saying that relatively “fight-free” relationships are to be feared. What I am saying is that fights and arguments are a normal, healthy part of relationships that can clear the marital clutter out of the way allowing better communication and love to flow. Fights are an opportunity to grow closer to one another. It is a way to respectfully communicate struggles or concerns to our spouse that are essential to keeping things on track. Working through issues together can really lead to a deep level of intimacy, love, and respect with and for one another.

The key thing with fighting is that you have to learn how to fight in order for it to be effective and a means of growing closer to one another. This week we are tackling that very issue, so make sure to tune in!

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Author : Ashley McIlwain

Ashley McIlwain, M.A., is a Marriage and Family Therapist, speaker, and writer. She is the founder and C.E.O. of the non-profit organization, Foundation Restoration, and blog LittleWifey.com, which are comprehensive resources committed to restoring the very foundation of society – marriage. She is committed to and passionate about helping relationships thrive. In the past Ashley acted as Managing Editor for StartMarriageRight.com where she helped launch and develop the website into a hub for premarital preparation. Ashley holds a bachelor’s degree in Psychology from Palm Beach Atlantic University and a master’s degree in Clinical Psychology with a specialization in Marriage and Family Therapy from Azusa Pacific University. Currently she and her husband, Steve, reside in Southern California.