Olympic athletes all have the same mindset – that they are a work in progress constantly training to become a better and stronger person. Knowing that gives them that ability to be tenacious and put forth the consistent effort we talked about earlier in the week. If you want to be the best, you have to realize there is always room for improvement; we are a constant work in progress.

Many of the athletes that I saw perform this year at the Winter Olympics were returning athletes. Time and time again you would hear stories of how the dream of medaling at the Olympics had missed them for one reason or another. Some fell, some slipped, some got injured, some just didn’t perform their best, some hadn’t trained hard enough, and some had made a simple mistake. What happened to those athletes after their dreams fell short? Most of them got up, trained harder, worked harder, and came back a million times more determined than before. Olympic athletes know that mistakes or stumbles are the building blocks for their future. Olympic athletes know they need to constantly improve, constantly learn, constantly work hard, and constantly train to stay on top of their game and their field.

Marriage requires the same mindset – that we are a work in progress constantly training to be the best in our marriage. Marriage, like life, has ups & downs, hilltops & valleys, winters & summers, but it’s always worth it. The truth is that while we would love marriage to entail skipping off into the sunset without a care in the world, that’s not reality. Marriage entails combining two lives that are two drastically contrasting genders each from two totally different families with their own set of baggage. That means that we have our work cut out for us. The fantastic and exciting news is that the love, intimacy, fun times, good times, memories, and adventures we share with our spouse are worth fighting for our marriage in the rough times. Marriage is amazing and such a rewarding gift from God, but we have to realize that we are works in progress that can constantly improve. We need training and to utilize adversity as a stepping stone for strengthening ourselves and our marriage.

I want to leave you with a quote from a movie you might have heard of A League of Their Own where Tom Hanks character says to one of the girls ready to quit playing baseball because it was too hard: “It’s supposed to be hard. If it wasn’t hard, everyone would do it. The hard… is what makes it great.” Marriage is hard, which is why so many marriages are falling by the wayside. Hard is an opportunity to grow stronger and closer together. Anyone can quit, but the best survive and go on to become the best.

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Author : Ashley McIlwain

Ashley McIlwain, M.A., is a Marriage and Family Therapist, speaker, and writer. She is the founder and C.E.O. of the non-profit organization, Foundation Restoration, and blog LittleWifey.com, which are comprehensive resources committed to restoring the very foundation of society – marriage. She is committed to and passionate about helping relationships thrive. In the past Ashley worked with Moody Publishers and Dr. Gary Chapman as Managing Editor to launch and develop a website focused on premarital preparation. Ashley holds a bachelor’s degree in Psychology from Palm Beach Atlantic University and a master’s degree in Clinical Psychology with a specialization in Marriage and Family Therapy from Azusa Pacific University. Currently she and her husband, Steve, reside in Southern California.