Posts Tagged ‘healing’

Noteworthy: Oh My Dear

Thursday, March 29th, 2012

By Ashley McIlwain

We all have a past. We all have baggage. We all have healing that needs to happen in our lives emotionally, spiritually, and relationally. Truthfully, we are all beautiful messes.

Often times we become acutely aware of this when we enter into a relationship. Suddenly our insecurities, fears, and brokenness rear their ugly heads taunting and tormenting us. Thoughts race through our minds of our inadequacies, and we begin to feel unlovable.

Some people respond to this onslaught of emotional bondage by shutting down. Others simply try to mask it all. The reality is that we need to face it all … honestly and openly. Yes, it’s painful and scary, but when we have met someone we are contemplating giving our heart to, then vulnerability and openness are absolutely essential to moving forward individually as well as in the relationship.

Most of what we think about ourselves is false messages … lies from Satan that try to deter us from the abundant blessings God has in store for us. If Satan can convince us that we are trash, then we never aspire to love, dream, or believe in God’s perfect plan for our life. Right?

That’s why we need to tackle our brokenness head on because each of us is fearfully and wonderfully made by a loving Creator (Psalm 139:14) who doesn’t make mistakes. And guess what? The person you are in love with has brokenness to deal with too, but he/she is still a masterpiece too. It’s about working together through the bruises and scars left by life and realizing that you aren’t damaged but rather equipped with valuable lessons you’ve learned through your experiences. You are stronger, wiser, and refined.

There’s a song that paints a picture of this healing process so beautifully. It’s by a band that I am superbly proud to say I went to college with. Unfortunately I never had the opportunity to build a friendship with them, but I did get to listen to them play around campus. While they may not know me, it doesn’t stop me from being ridiculously supportive and excited for them and the way God is using their band and inspirational music.

Tenth Avenue North is a band that gets it. Their music is straight from the heart with messages that speak to the heart. In one of their lesser known songs, Oh My Dear, you are taken on an intimate journey between two people working through their pain and brokenness.

Take a listen, and let me know what you think! By the way, you can snag this song (or any of their songs) here. You can also get the full scoop on Tenth Avenue North by visiting their website.

*To comment on this entry, simply click on the “no comment” link in blue just below the post (if someone has already commented, you will see a number instead of “no” in front of “comment”). Fill out the form that pops up. Your name & email are not required. Once you have entered your comment, click on the “Submit a Comment,” and it will appear once it is approved for posting.”

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Posted in Blog, Noteworthy, Relationships | 4 Comments »

Power of Prayer: Introduction

Monday, April 19th, 2010

The older I get, the more I realize just how out of control I really am of my life. I plan, organize, and worry, but in the end, life has a way of throwing us curve balls anyway. Each passing day seems to bring with it a rate of passing time that is scary. It all flies by so quickly, and we just try to grasp on to anything that “feels” secure. Security is something we all want, and so we trust in the security of our jobs, homes, strength, money, etc. The truth is that there is no real security in any of those things. Jobs can end up as unemployment. Homes can be destroyed. Our strength can abandon us. Our money can be gone in an instant. There is one thing I have found that has stood the test of time providing the only security this life truly has to offer, and that is my relationship with Jesus Christ.

Marriage is no different than anything else in life in that it can throw us curve balls, challenge us, and leave us wondering where our security went. It is a day-to-day process that we have to constantly work at and commit to. What happens when it feels like it’s out of control? What happens when we  just can’t see eye to eye? What happens when we think we just can’t extend grace and love to our spouse? What happens when the unthinkable happens? What happens when we are struggling to forgive? Well, I can tell you what I do when I don’t know what else to do…pray.

Prayer is a 24/7 hot-line straight to our Creator who is the only one that is truly in control, that can change our circumstances, that can make a way when there is none, and that can bring hope & healing to any situation or relationship. The older I get the more I realize just how little control I really have and how much I really need Jesus. I know not all of you are Christians, but maybe you could just bear with me and give this whole thing a shot. It can’t hurt. This week, I want to propose a few specific prayers for all of us to try saying to God for ourselves and for our marriage. Join me as we tap into the power of prayer.

*To comment on this entry, simply click on the “no comment” link in blue just below the post (if someone has already commented, you will see a number instead of “no” in front of “comment”). Fill out the form that pops up. Your name & email are not required. Once you have entered your comment, click on the “Submit a Comment,” and it will appear once it is approved for posting.

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The Cross: Hope & Life

Thursday, April 1st, 2010

“I have come that they may have life, and have it more abundantly.” ~ John 10:10

One of my favorite parts of being a Christian is that it’s all about having the best and fullest life possible. It’s being able to have hope and life anchored in the love of Jesus Christ. So many people have the view of Christianity as this list of do’s and don’ts pedaled by a bunch of hypocrites and crazies. While I understand that not all experiences with Christians are positive ones, my hope is that people will see a truer and deeper essence of what Christianity is about. We are given do’s and don’ts not to deprive us but to guide us to a richer and fuller life. Just like a parent sets boundaries for their child to protect him/her, God has given us boundaries to protect us. He also gave us grace & forgiveness for when we fall short, love & sacrifice unconditionally all the time, and hope for a better life anchored in him. I love the following verses:

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.” ~John 3:16-17.

In marriage, things get tough and we flat out need help. For my husband and I, we are so thankful to be able to pray to God for hope and life in our marriage, for help, and for guidance. There is hope and life for our marriages and for our lives. Christ promises to be amidst us in our trials and tribulations. He can offer you help and strength in those tough times. “Again, I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them.”~ Matthew 18:19-20. Sometimes the answers and help are not instantaneous or even what we are expecting, but He always comes through for those who believe in Him because He loves us.

The message of the cross is one of hope and abundant life, and that applies to our marriages too. There is help; you just have to be willing to ask for it.

*To comment on this entry, simply click on the “no comment” link in blue just below the post (if someone has already commented, you will see a number instead of “no” in front of “comment”). Fill out the form that pops up. Your name & email are not required. Once you have entered your comment, click on the “Submit a Comment,” and it will appear once it is approved for posting.

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